Tuesday, May 18, 2004
Hazleton Pravda is sorry to have been away without updates for sometime, but our staff has been doing its best to research more and better Meat & Potatoes stories to bring to you. Here’s what we found in the quagmire that is *trumpets please* The Greater Hazleton Area!
Drums Reservist Involved in Prisoner Mistreatment.
Figures. People from this area do it all the time. They just can’t seem to function outside this close-knit little time-warped area. Out in the big, big world they behave like violent animals. That guy that killed Dominique Dunne, John David Sweeney. He was a Hazleton native off his mark. People around here got a get a grip on themselves and stop behaving sub-human!
Quiznos Comes to Markle Building
They’ll leave as soon as their lease is up and their free-tax status drops away!
Woman Charged in Freeland Stabbing
Another day, another mutilation. Yadda, yadda, yadda.
PA Reservist First to Be Tried in Prison Scandal
Seems that all the war prisoners were being watched by rabid Pennsyltucky lunatics, hand picked and placed in one single battalion due to psychological problems.
Revised Landlord Law in Hazleton
It appears that someone drew up a proposal that covered all the bases very well. Mayor Lou only wants a ‘bare-bones’ easy to pass one though! Naturally. ‘Hey, just cuz I’m elected to office doesn’t mean I want the do the job! I have pasta to eat!’
Merchandise seized from West Hazleton Business
Some one caught pirating DVDs and other things. Media in all its forms should be FREE to be copied! Well I’d guess the state police now have a really beefed-up film library now. *singing* On to Pirate Video!
Schuylkill Priest & Porn
Another man of the cloth or is that closet? Child porn is just twisted, man!
Simmons Company Comes to Area
Here’s an example of employment scamming where a company comes in offering maybe a few hundred jobs and it makes the locals beg like dogs for a bone. They have this wonderfully long and agonizing scheme of bringing people in on their own time to first a seminar for about two hours then you come back for an interview, a test (how much do you need to know about mattresses?) and drug screen, which is a load of nonsense (If you’re intoxicated on the job that’s one thing, and one thing that HAS to be proven anyway. What you do on your free time as you are only bidding for employment anyway, is your business!). Then after all that, they can still turn you away! So you’ve wasted all your time. The human resource dept don’t care. They’re salary anyway. Either way they get paid. Special thanks to CANT DO for offering us up as slave labor to the mighty cheap companies! Now everyone make sure to rush on down to the Career Center and fill out your application! Stool samples will be taken on your way out.
This was basically what the wonderfully relaxed Career Center had to express to Hazleton pravda about employment at Simmons Company. Careerlink...the only job security in Hazleton!
Drums Reservist Involved in Prisoner Mistreatment.
Figures. People from this area do it all the time. They just can’t seem to function outside this close-knit little time-warped area. Out in the big, big world they behave like violent animals. That guy that killed Dominique Dunne, John David Sweeney. He was a Hazleton native off his mark. People around here got a get a grip on themselves and stop behaving sub-human!
Quiznos Comes to Markle Building
They’ll leave as soon as their lease is up and their free-tax status drops away!
Woman Charged in Freeland Stabbing
Another day, another mutilation. Yadda, yadda, yadda.
PA Reservist First to Be Tried in Prison Scandal
Seems that all the war prisoners were being watched by rabid Pennsyltucky lunatics, hand picked and placed in one single battalion due to psychological problems.
Revised Landlord Law in Hazleton
It appears that someone drew up a proposal that covered all the bases very well. Mayor Lou only wants a ‘bare-bones’ easy to pass one though! Naturally. ‘Hey, just cuz I’m elected to office doesn’t mean I want the do the job! I have pasta to eat!’
Merchandise seized from West Hazleton Business
Some one caught pirating DVDs and other things. Media in all its forms should be FREE to be copied! Well I’d guess the state police now have a really beefed-up film library now. *singing* On to Pirate Video!
Schuylkill Priest & Porn
Another man of the cloth or is that closet? Child porn is just twisted, man!
Simmons Company Comes to Area
Here’s an example of employment scamming where a company comes in offering maybe a few hundred jobs and it makes the locals beg like dogs for a bone. They have this wonderfully long and agonizing scheme of bringing people in on their own time to first a seminar for about two hours then you come back for an interview, a test (how much do you need to know about mattresses?) and drug screen, which is a load of nonsense (If you’re intoxicated on the job that’s one thing, and one thing that HAS to be proven anyway. What you do on your free time as you are only bidding for employment anyway, is your business!). Then after all that, they can still turn you away! So you’ve wasted all your time. The human resource dept don’t care. They’re salary anyway. Either way they get paid. Special thanks to CANT DO for offering us up as slave labor to the mighty cheap companies! Now everyone make sure to rush on down to the Career Center and fill out your application! Stool samples will be taken on your way out.
This was basically what the wonderfully relaxed Career Center had to express to Hazleton pravda about employment at Simmons Company. Careerlink...the only job security in Hazleton!
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