Wednesday, September 15, 2004
We in the Hazleton area are all familiar with ‘2 Guys From Italy’ pizza joints. For the longest time, the Laurel Mall was home to one, probably the only decent shop in the mall simply because they served beer. That’s the only way to tolerate the Laurel Mall by being shnookered!
So there I was screwing around in Wilkes-Barre this week when I spotted ‘III Guys From Italy’ I would have preferred to have run into Katana’s for some Sashimi, but since I was broke that wouldn’t have helped either way. Anyway, I turned to my companion and fellow councilman Doynar Yar and suggested that the further North a person goes, the more Italians it takes to run a pizza shop. I wondered if we went further north if we would find ‘IV Guys From Italy’, maybe in Scranton. I was vexed at the thought of just how many Italians would be in the title of a shop in New York City. I can’t even guess.
Upon further discussion it was postulated that the number of Italians in a shops title may have something with the size of the city. Take McAdoo for instance, they might only half an Italian in business there, so it’d be ‘Half an Italian Guy’s Pizza’ whereas Freeland used to just have one Italian guy’s pizza in the form of Sal Sorrento (spelling notwithstanding), only he was smart enough to name his shop Sorrento’s Pizza. That’s only because he was a Sicilian, not a Hazleton Deigo. And with city size as a measuring factor Scranton may have indeed four Italian guy pizza shops, but Philadelphia might have upwards to five or six Italians required in their title to run properly.
So whether it be the Compass Theory or City-Size Theory please feel free loyal Pravda fans to write in and give your opinions on this strange new phenomenon.
--Gombeggar
So there I was screwing around in Wilkes-Barre this week when I spotted ‘III Guys From Italy’ I would have preferred to have run into Katana’s for some Sashimi, but since I was broke that wouldn’t have helped either way. Anyway, I turned to my companion and fellow councilman Doynar Yar and suggested that the further North a person goes, the more Italians it takes to run a pizza shop. I wondered if we went further north if we would find ‘IV Guys From Italy’, maybe in Scranton. I was vexed at the thought of just how many Italians would be in the title of a shop in New York City. I can’t even guess.
Upon further discussion it was postulated that the number of Italians in a shops title may have something with the size of the city. Take McAdoo for instance, they might only half an Italian in business there, so it’d be ‘Half an Italian Guy’s Pizza’ whereas Freeland used to just have one Italian guy’s pizza in the form of Sal Sorrento (spelling notwithstanding), only he was smart enough to name his shop Sorrento’s Pizza. That’s only because he was a Sicilian, not a Hazleton Deigo. And with city size as a measuring factor Scranton may have indeed four Italian guy pizza shops, but Philadelphia might have upwards to five or six Italians required in their title to run properly.
So whether it be the Compass Theory or City-Size Theory please feel free loyal Pravda fans to write in and give your opinions on this strange new phenomenon.
--Gombeggar
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